My Goals and Stuff

I'm trying to gear up for my interview tomorrow. It's a job I don't especially want, but need very much. I've decided to go ahead and take the restaurant job if it is ever offered to me. I just can't continue worrying about money every second of every day. It makes my life that much less enjoyable and I've been doing that for quite some time now. There are the obvious downfalls like I'll have to tell everyone at my high school reunion that I went to college for absolutely no reason and now run a restaurant. I don't really like that. There is also the chance that I will become stuck in the restaurant industry like the quicksand that it is and then the R.O.U.Ses will come and devour me. If only...

Anyway, I need to mentally prepare because I quite often say really ridiculous things when I'm nervous thinking I'm just being funny. I do feel a little dishonest since I am thinking that I will need to move somewhere else by the end of my lease and they are looking for someone who is interested in moving up in the ranks of their company. I feel dishonest but I also don't really care. It is just a restaurant and they can certainly find a replacement if I don't like it and still want to move by July. I really don't see myself living here past that right now though. I like Charleston, I just don't really like the people. Even though it's always taken me a long time to make friends, I've lived here eight months and still wouldn't call any of these people my friends. Of course I would need to start from scratch again if I go somewhere else. That sounds tiring.

I have promised myself that with the extra money I'll be making, I'll finally take myself on one of the volunteer trips I've been talking about for the last three years. I won't really have any excuses so you guys need to hold me to it.

And in shorter term goals, I've decided I'm going to attend all the Krav classes I that my schedule allows. That's five not including the sparring class. I probably won't go to that one. I'm stuck in a vicious cycle of feeling like a jackass when I'm there because I'm not as good as I want to be and not going therefore not learning because I feel like a jackass. Also I just want to see how my body holds up by the end of the week to kind of gauge how many classes I can really handle. Sometimes I don't give myself a chance because I'm being too protective of my medical stuff. Screw that.