Food for Thought

1. Standard gratuity is 18%
2. If you put your silverware on your plate and pile all kinds of napkins and other crap from the table, that means your waitress will be in the back fishing the silverware out and getting her hands disgustingly dirty. She also may not have time to wash her hands post-fishing expedition.
3. If a waitress comes to your table and asks, "Is everything ok?" and one person asks for something, go ahead and tell her everything you need so she doesn't have to back three or four times for random crap like ranch, lemon, ketchup, etc.

Read this. I just got some Cheesy Fiesta Potatoes that had an unusual amount of green onions. I'm going to die.

Wrath of Kat

I cleaned out my car a few days ago. It was quite an undertaking. Now I have to figure out what to do with all this stuff. I decided to go to the cabin to pick up my hope chest. I was pretty excited to have a place to put some of my graphic design stuff and art work. I opened it up and someone had put my old Bible and Book of Mormon with my name on them. I am most SERIOUSLY DISPLEASED.

Latest Digital Imaging Project

Assignment: a sequential narrative that shows motion and a passage of time.

Discuss. Thoughts. Commments...

Pictures

Here are some pictures to balance out the previous honesty.

Honesty Alert

Mary Ann asked for more information about the William-parent meeting from last week. I was going to e-mail it, but I figured hey, this blog is all about honesty so why censor myself? See I have all this pent up anger that I've been told I need to let out so I decided to go ahead and do that. Some people may not want to read this and I think you know who you are.


The meeting on the whole went fairly well. Will is really good with people, he called them ma'am and sir. I was pretty uncomfortable. Probably the most uncomfortable out of everybody there. I was already mad at Mom for something so I was a little snippy. She made a couple of jokes at my expense which certainly didn't help my mood, but made Will laugh. For example, "Yeah Dan and I ate at The Library one evening and I just thought, 'we could really loan Katie Isabella's kilt and it would be the same length as her skirt'." Well, why do you think Will called me in the first place? So basically, William was charming, Mom and Dad were charming. Everything was great--precisely the problem.


Will and everybody else from high school knew I had problems with my parents without even knowing much about me as a person. Every time I saw Will's current roommate he would say something along the lines of, "Kat, What's up? How's stuff with your parents?" I told Will that things are mostly better with Mom and Dad and of course for the first few meetings everything would be fine. After meeting them, he basically told me that my relationship with my parents is what it is because I'm too negative. That he barely knew me in high school but he knew I had trouble with my family. At that point I started to cry. That's right, I started to cry at the bar at Outback. I put my hand down and I told Will that he didn't know how bad things got back then and it was unfair of him to make judgments based on one evening with my parents. He got freaked out because I've never gotten that upset in front of him.

I'm glad things are better with Mom and Dad. Honestly. I think back to how I felt on a daily basis back then and I hope I never feel like that again. I also hope that if I have children that they never feel that way. The fact of the matter is that there is a separation between me and several family members that will never be removed. I'm different, my beliefs are different. I think a lot of people in the family don't view me as an equal or think I'm as good as them because I have a different lifestyle. That's just the truth. The bottom line is that I try hard to be a good person and I'm happy with who I am. I know I'm not perfect, but I try to do what I think is right and that's what's important to me.

So, Mary Ann, if you're still reading, overall the meeting went well. Things with William and I are really good. I think that when things move into the "serious" category I might try and expose him to a family function experience, but not until I'm fairly sure he won't go anywhere.

Isabella Fish

I've been promising Isabella pictures of her "Isabella-Fish" for weeks now. These were the best I could do. Isabella-Fish is not a fan of the flash. She will be waiting for my Princess Peanut Brittle to visit at Chrisfuss time.

Better Picture

William met the 'rents this evening. The actual meeting went really well. Post-meeting was not so great and we'll just leave it at that.

We're really, really ridiculously good-looking I must say.

Update

Stuff's been going pretty well. I still don't really care about school, but I'm making more money at work and my social life is pretty good. Things with William change hour to hour, but overall I feel good about it. Today is his birthday and I gave him his present last Thursday. For those of you who don't know, I bought him a minibar. It was more expensive than the shirts he wanted, but I figured I could get some use out of it too. He really liked it. He's been telling everyone he knows about it. I even had one of his friends' parents come up to me and tell me he heard about the gift.

My friend and ex-coworker, Flo, died the week before last. I haven't cried much about it, but I've been pretty upset. My ex-boyfriend, Dustin, was at the funeral. He kind of hit on me a little bit and even apologized to me (in his own little Dustin way) about what happened between us. William thinks I cheated on him with Dustin. Whatever.

I met the family yesterday. They're really nice, but didn't necessarily seem really impressed by me. Will kind of said they've met a lot of girls over the years so I guess it's not such a big deal that I met them. His Dad called me Pat. They did all seem very interested by the fact that Will and I graduated together since apparently Will's parents went to high school together and Will's sister married her high school sweetheart. Everyone in his family calls him William and apparently that's his preferred name so I'm trying to get in the habit of it, but I feel kind of goofy.

Um, what else...yeah I guess that's it.

Here it is...sort of

Matt asked for a picture of my "boyfriend." Here is the only picture taken of us. The photographer was rather drunk so it's blurry, but you get the idea of what he looks like anyway. He's also very sunburnt.

O.W.L.s Blow

I had my Harry Potter midterm today. 110 questions, I would say 15 were about mythology. I haven't had time to reread the 3rd or 4th books and I'm not sure I finished the 2nd so you can imagine how well I did. I stayed up pretty much all night and too stupid online fan trivia quizzes on the first 4 books. A surprising (or not so surprising) number of questions from past tests were pulled straight from these fan quizzes. I think all it did was obliterate my memory. I would read a question on the test and think, "I just answered that five hours ago..." If you were sitting near me you would have heard a lot of whispered "S-words" and "F-words." Maybe one followed directly by the other. I hate that class. Come to think of it I pretty much hate all my classes. I'm only taking class that pertains to my major and I've actually already taken that class so I feel like everything I do all day long, I'm wasting my time. Damn it, man.

William update

So, I don't want to jinx things, but I think stuff with Will is going pretty well. He's really high maintenance which isn't necessarily a good thing. I pretty much always feel like I'm wearing my pajamas when I'm around him and his friends. I seriously have not been over there one time without someone saying something about clothes. These are 22 year old--or older--guys talking about Ralph Lauren, Eddie Bauer, or in "Piggy's" case, Rochester Big & Tall. It's pretty funny.

His birthday is in 26 days and I am freaking out a little bit. We've only been seeing each other a little over a month so I don't really know how much effort I should put into his gift(s). He's one of those people who thinks more expensive=better.

The only pictures I have of him are from high school so I guess I'll have to see how he feels about me taking some more recent pictures of him.

FYI

I have a boyfriend. His name is Will. I went to high school with him. None of you will meet him any time soon if I can help it. So there you go...

I Don't Like This

I was only supposed to work 11-5 today. Someone else got fired--I swear someone quits or gets fired every day--so I agreed to 5-vol. That means that I'm supposed to go home when it slows down, usually about 10. It was a freakin' nightmare. I thought last Saturday was bad when Mom and Dad came in...this was worse. I ended up serving $1046 of food and beverages between the hourse of 5-10. I only made $120. That's bullshit, man. I saw another friend from back home though.

Today

This morning I got behind an SUV with a bumper sticker that said "Support Our Troops, Enlist Bush." That made me giggle. Then I noticed they had a Vietnam Veteran license plate. Intriguing. Then I saw a "W The President" sticker. Above that was one of those stickers that says something like, "If you're not completely disgusted, You're not paying attention." In what order do you think those items were put on there?

I left my house early so I could go get my revised digital imaging project printed and go to WalMart to get items for matting. On the way to Staples I realized I forgot to put my project on my jump drive before I left. I didn't have time to go back. So, I decided I would skip that class. Since I wasn't going to that class I didn't need to go to WalMart either.

I had my second Harry Potter test today. I didn't finish the book. I don't think I did that well.

Then I went to Economics. That class was okay, just really boring. During that class I realized that I had promised to help a girl mat her digital imaging project my lunch break and I was supposed to bring the blade and tape and stuff. Oops. I went ahead and waited for her in the mat-cutting room. Someone left their mat-cutter in there and we found some tape in the hall so that was lucky. The biggest problem was that it is right next to my digital imaging classroom so the whole time I was trying to avoid my teacher since I wasn't going to class. I succeeded thankfully.

So then I went to Chick-fil-A since I had about 3 hours to kill. I talked to Megan for a while and tried to finish the Harry Potter book I was just tested on. My O.W.L is coming up and it's cumulative, you know. Then I went back to school for ballet.

After ballet I was walking back to my car. Walked up all 150 stairs at the LLC and up the huge hill on Bodenheimer. I stepped into the church parking lot and didn't see my car. I got really mad thinking they towed it even though I have sticker. Then I realized, I parked in the Stadium when I came back from Chick-fil-A because it's closer to the gym.

I got home and got a really offensive e-mail from that incompetent lady that I'm doing the conference brochure for. I resigned.

So, somebody told me today that they don't believe that I don't take aderol and that they think I have a prescription. I'm going to go ahead and take that as a compliment. Maybe they think it's impossible to do all the things I do in one day with out a little help. If they only saw the naps I take in the yellow apartment of Dad's house.

I need some kisses from my baby nieces.

Stuff

There is a boy in my Harry Potter class that looks a lot like Harry Potter.

There is a girl in my World Civilizations 2 class that has worn something either white with black polka dots, or black with white polka dots every class meeting so far. Not so amazing since we only meet on Tuesday nights, but that's still three Tuesdays in a row.

Some guys from my high school came to The Library last night. I gave them my number since I'm bored out of my mind up here by myself. One of them actually just called me. Unexpected.

DJ's baby will be one year old in one month.

Hmmm...

Samantha: "...I'm pretty sure it was Colby. He made fun of me 'cause I'm Mormon so I can be as mean to him as I want."

"The Most Fun You'll Ever Have At The Library"

That would be one of the restaurant's advertising slogans. Last night I worked my first weekend night by myself. It was CRAZY!! Thank goodness the App v. NC State game wasn't televised or it would have been unbearable. As it was there was a group of 30 that called and weaseled an invitation out of the General Manager. We're not really supposed to do reservations. They told him they were a group of lawyers getting together to watch a game. They showed up and appeared to be an average of 17-years-old. Some of them couldn't speak English. Luckily I wasn't their waitress, but it caused everything else to get backed up.

My customers were mostly pretty nice. One table came into to drink and listen to the band of the night. It was close to closing time and I asked them if it was all one ticket. They said yes and literally during the 30 seconds it took me to print their ticket they all booked it out of there. I went outside and asked who was paying. They tried to play it off like it was an accident, but come on...consequently they didn't tip me anything. The girl I was working with had two tables walk out on her. I also took care of the band. They ran me ragged getting them beer and Coke or whatever. They wanted me to sit on one of their laps to take a picture for their website. Then they only tipped me $9 off of an $81 dollar tab. Yeah, thanks.

There was a group of three guys from Raleigh that were all pretty nice. One of them left his debit card. And his phone number. That situation is a little weird. Nobody ever hits on me and they had been drinking...I left the card behind the bar and called a few minutes ago to let him know where it was. His ringback tone was some kind of orchestral music. I'm sure Josh would know it, it's pretty common, but I just don't remember. It caught me off guard I always expect some kind of rap music after I hear the, "Please enjoy the music while your party is reached." Anyway, he said he had just picked it up so I don't guess it was a pickup to leave it. Although Megan and I agreed it would be a pretty clever way to pickup somebody. A little risky, but clever.

Today someone asked me if I could score them some pot, my gums were assaulted at the dentist office, and Isabella shat on my leg. I know some family members are having worse days but I still thought mine was worth mentioning.

No really, you're serious?

I went to dinner with another "friend" tonight and had a conversation that went something like this:

Courtney: "So anyway, how are you doing?"

Me: "I'm doing better."

Courtney: "Good."

Complete silence. No questions about why I was doing badly to begin with.

Me: "My brother was in Beirut for all attacks."

Courtney: "Awesome."

Complete silence.

Me: "I guess I'm pretty irritated that not one single friend of mine called to see how my brother was doing."

More silence.

Courtney: "Well, I know it sounds bad, but I didn't know anything had happened."

Me: "Yeah, I'm working under that assumption for most people. I guess I wouldn't really be following it if I didn't have family there and we didn't have Lebanese ancestory."

Courtney: "Man, Anthony (her boyfriend) is going to kill me. He's a middle eastern studies major."

Me: "And he didn't mention this at all?"

Courtney: "He doesn't really talk about that stuff to me 'cause he knows I don't really care."

Yeah. That's a relationship that will last a long time.

Um, are you serious?

One of my longtime friends went to Singapore to visit her fiancee who is in the marines stationed there for some reason. I thought she wasn't leaving for another week so I called the good old TCBY of Morganton to try and get a hold of her (she works there in the summers). My best friend also works there but I left the message for Kristen and not for my best friend. I got a message later in the day from a very displeased best friend asking me to call her. I knew she would be upset that I didn't ask for her, but with all the other stresses going on right now I wasn't really interested in hearing that right now. Problem is that Ashley is just like me and the longer you wait the worse the backlash is. I called her after TCBY closed and she immediately asked me why I called for Kristen and not her. I explained to her I was trying to talk to her before she went overseas. I guess that appeased her and she asked me how I'm doing. The conversation went something like this:

Me: "Well, I'm not really doing that good."

Ashley: "What's wrong?"

Me: "Well, have you heard about the bombings in--"

Ashley: "...In Leb--what's it called?--Lebanon. Now who's there your dad or brother?"

Me: "My brother."

Ashley: "Yeah, I heard about that and I thought your brother was in Egypt or Lebanon or somewhere. That's actually why I called."

(sidenote: I think it's pretty obvious that's not why she called. She didn't say anything about it in her message and chose to ask why I called Kristen first. I would hope that if she remembered about my brother living in a war torn country that she would bring that up first).

Me: "Yeah, well we're all pretty worried because Israel is slowly cutting off all modes of transportation out of the country so they're unable to evacuate him right now."

Ashley: "Yeah, I heard that gas is going to get to, like, $4.00 a gallon cause of that shit."

Me in my head: "Are you really asking me about gas prices when I just told you that my brother and his family are stuck in Beirut while everything is getting bombed?"

What I actually said: "That's unclear at this point."

This conversation is pretty disappointing. She said she was going to call me back when she got home from work and never did. I kind of feel like unless I have a story that sounds like an episode of the O.C. then very few people my age want to hear about it. Pretend like it's "24" and then maybe you'll want to listen.

Dad's New Stationery Package

In the Graphic Communications class I'm taking right now we are designing and printing a stationery package. The package has to be in grayscale, but it's essentially all free so I decided to see if Dad wanted me to design something for him. We've been trying to settle on a design for him for probably about a year. This is one area where Dad is pretty indecisive. Does he want logo, does he not want a logo, does he want to use "The Pediatric Group," does he want just his name? It was a little too much for his little brain to handle. Eventually we decided to market himself under just his name with a logo that conveys a feeling of safety and protection. So here is the package minus the envelope because I'm still working on that. Let me know what you guys think, but don't undo any of the progress I've made with Dad's decision making. If you do I'll mail that dead rabbit to you. I can imagine it would be pretty smelly if it had to go all the way to Lebanon.

Here is his business card. Orginally we had discussed a vertical card but it was too hard to fit all the information on it. Sorry about the borders, it is hard to see the margins.

This is the notepad design. I tried to keep it pretty plain in case he wants to write in pencil. I also still need to change the logo to dark gray instead of black.

Here is the letterhead. Also a little hard to see without page edges.

I Think I'm Going to Puke

I think it isn't a surprise to any of you that I have some pretty serious anxiety problems as well as significant obsessive compulsive tendencies. These conditions are directly related to my stress/happiness level. They've gotten pretty bad lately. Adding to these issues is the amount of vermin and pestilence I've had to deal with.

First of all, I have these prehistoric sized crickets that have invaded my kitchen and bathroom. I have found three so far in my shower after I have already disrobed. They jump really high and completely creep me out. I found another one drowned in a container of water I left in my kitchen. I generally try to catch bugs and put them back outside but I've kind of reached my limit. They're really too big to squash though. I can only imagine the sound and smear one of them would make. Ugh. The other day I found another one on my kitchen floor. I decided to spray it. It crawled underneath my freezer to so I just sprayed all around and underneath the freezer. Since I don't usually kill bugs I guess I didn't really realize how long it would take for it to die. After about half an hour it came limping back out onto the floor draging its pathetic immobilized back legs. I sprayed it some more and it turned over on its back flailing its legs. The most disgusting thing was that I could hear its mouth open and close making a little smacking noise. This happened several days ago but I'm still repulsed. Eventually it was almost dead but still flailing so I scooped it up in a paper towel and threw it away.

Second of all, I got to the cabin today and saw some kind of dead animal in the driveway. It was a rabbit with the fur from its backside removed. Pretty disgusting. I went inside and told Mom just to see what she wanted me to do. She told me to not let Sophie out and throw it in the woods. I threw it in the woods and then let Sophie out. I didn't really figure Mom wanted the dog kept in the house until the rabbit decomposed. About an hour later Sophie was barking to be let in so I went to the door and looked out only to see the rabbit there again. Only this time, more fur was gone its spine was sticking out and I think its kidneys were strewn onto the walkway. I threw up in my mouth a little bit. I called Dad and told me to put it in a bag. I told him I didn't think I could do that so he said to leave it and he would figure something out when he got home. I saw Sophie and her beard was all red/brown. It's always discolored so it is hard to say whether or not it was from the rabbit or not. After I thought about it for a little while I felt bad leaving it for Dad since he works a lot harder than I do and I'm kind of supposed to do the stuff at the house that he doesn't have time for or just doesn't want to do. I donned my surgical gloves and tied Sophie up without touching her fur. I then tried to somehow scoop the rabbit carcass with a snow shovel and trash bag. I've kind of blocked that out from my memory, but I do know it took a lot longer than I would have liked. There were flies buzzing all around my head. I finally got it bagged but the kidneys were still there. I sprayed them off of the deck with the hose and then sprayed Sophie down. I'm pretty sure that will piss Mom off but I'm not entirely sure I care.

I'm never doing that again.

Graphic Design

So, many of you have heard of the evil teacher I had for Graphic Design 2 and Digital Imaging. I believe she unjustly failed me in Digital Imaging so in trying to retake it I have to put off graduation for a semester. She also made me so miserable during GD 2 that I seriously considered switching my major to pretty much anything else to prevent having her as a teacher again. Fortunately I didn't have to do that because she moved back to Louisiana. I cried. Obviously.

I've been really curious to find out who her replacement is. We're going to have a substitute for a year until we can interview candidates and then the students will have some input about her official replacement. I probably won't ever have this substitute teacher, but I'm a little irritated by who they chose. It's a teacher already at Appalachian in the Expressive Arts department who doesn't even have a Graphic Design degree. She has a BFA with a "design emphasis" from UNCG. Not at all the same thing. She has two Masters degrees neither of which are in Graphic Design. I could see her being a sufficient replacement for the Digital Imaging class, but not for any actual Graphic Design class.

Also, I am being stalked by a fellow design student. Okay not really, but I have my fifth class with the same girl who is more than a little irritating at times. She thinks she knows everything about the profession already so she's really not receptive to any kind of criticism. She's obsessed with everything graphic design and has some of the weirdest ideas ever. Innovation is important, but I'm talking weird. When we were redesigning the art department brochure she wanted to include a pair of gloves with each brochure so the recipients would feel like they are safe and taken care of at App. That's really one of the more mild ideas. Anyway, she's obsessed with the profession but can't seem to get through the classes. When I found out I would be graduating late one of my first thoughts was, "Hey, I won't have a class with Kate anymore." Not true. She failed GD 2 so we will be taking GD 3-5 together. At least I can find her amusing now instead wanting to strangle her.

Adorable Pictures

Here are some pictures from Becca's visit to the homestead. There are lots more that I might post if I get the inclination.

Observation

Muscle looks a lot better when it's not underneath several inches of fat.

Also, if you guys missed the link Josh put on another post you should really check it out. Hilarity.

http://www.homestarrunner.com/tgsmenu.html

Ahhh...Summer

I really like summer. I really like spring too, but in Boone there really is no such thing. Here's some stuff I couldn't live without in summer:

1. Really cold chocolate milk
2. Really cold lemon ice water
3. All the fruit: cantaloupe, oranges, plums, peaches, nectarines...
4. Peanut butter--this is a staple of any season
5. The ability to sit outside and enjoy the weather without important appendages freezing off.

Hair cuts

I thought Megan or Josh might do a post on Isabella's hair cut, but they didn't. Megan decided to cut Isa's hair a little bit since it's summer and also Isabella isn't so much into letting Megan fix her hair. First, Megan got the scissors and comb out and set them on the coffee table. She went and started doing laundry or something which left Isabella and I in the living room watching TV. I saw her go and get the scissors and comb, but didn't really think much of it. She started combing my hair which was fine and just as Megan was rounding the corner, I hear a small but deafening snip. My hair is really long and I'm totally freaked out about cutting it. I thought maybe she just cut above my hair. Megan ran over and took the scissors and starting fussing at Isabella. Isabella defended herself by saying, "I was just pretendin'! I was just pretendin'!" Megan pulled the cut lock of hair out of my ponytail and said, "Look at this! You weren't pretending you really cut her hair!" It was a little traumatic at first, but so far I haven't been able to tell where she cut. I'm too lazy to straighten my hair right now, so who knows what it will look like then.

Anyway, back to Isabella's hair cut. Megan videotaped some of it, so I'll try not to give too much away. I told her to start in the middle so it would be easier to make sure she was cutting it evenly. She did, but she forgot to make sure that Isabella's head was level. Isa was watching TV so her head was looking up pretty high. As a result, Isabella's hair is a little more the length that Megan wanted it and a couple inches shorter than Josh wanted it. It's still adorable as you can see in the pictures on Josh's blog.

I miss...

Grrrr....

So today the kids were back. In my way. I walked a little further and there were even more kids. Like 20 or 30 from a Montessori school. I wasn't irritated by them though because they were actually there for a purpose. They were assisting with the freshly planted vegetable and flower garden. Also, there were two dads with babies strapped to them in conversation who managed to move when I came along. Quite impressive. Maybe I should get them to talk to the other obnoxious moms.

However, the real annoyance came when I got out of class. We got out almost an hour early which was pretty exciting. I was walking past the gym and one of the many cheerleading squads was exiting presumably for lunch. They were chanting. They were chanting this:

Annoying Girl #1: "My name is (insert any cheerleader name, Brittany, Ashley, Amber, etc) and you know what I got?"

Annoying Squad: "What do you got?"

Annoying Girl #1: "I got a squad that I know is hot."

Annoying Squad: "How hot is hot?"

Yeah, that was it. The first time I didn't mind so much. But then they just kept repeating it with different girls leading. Then they followed me into the very echoy tunnel. After about the fifth time I can't explain to you how difficult it was to not turn around and scream, "Shut the f#!$ up!!!" I'm not enjoying summer school.

Boooo

So, I don't mean to be insensitive, but I'm really upset about Dad's luggage. But not in the nice way. I spent like between 50-60 hours on customized presents for you guys and I'll be really upset if they got lost. On the other hand, if they didn't get lost then all his clothes and stuff did. I mean, I guess I could reproduce most of the stuff I made whereas it would be more difficult for Dad to replace all the other stuff in his other suitcase.

The parents with their kids are back. Today they were blocking the entrance to the courtyard of the residence hall I walk through. There was a table set up that said something like "Appalachian Historical Museum." Just a table with a plastic container and some papers. It was pretty puzzling. And really, really annoying. I just don't understand people who see someone walking and just stand there staring at them without moving. If I was going to take my kids anywhere on campus it would be the duck pond. It's so pretty and there are benches and a little hut thing to stand under. I just don't get this whole thing. I realize that I'm working with an extra short fuse nowadays and especially so in the morning, but I think if they would just get out of the way I would be fine. It's the parents and the kids. They just stand there like they don't understand why a college student would be walking to class on a college campus. To add to the fun, freshman orientation is going on as well as cheerleading camp.

Here is a list of the Top 10 Most Stolen Cars. I thought the results were quite strange.

I'm a Mythological Genius! Hmmm, wait a minute...

We got our second test back today and I got a 100! I was pretty surprised. We had an essay we had to prepare before class and I didn't do it until about an hour before class. I didn't even do the reading until 2 o'clock in the morning. We have two more tests. Our test averages make up 85% of our final grade. I can't possibly keep this up, but I'm enjoying it for now.

Ok. So Here's the Thing...

There are lots of playgrounds in town. I can think of three right off the top of my head and I don't even have kids. It's not like this is Lebanon where you're kids have to play in puddles infested by mosquito larvae. Therefore, I am at a loss as to why for the past three days a group of about five little kids and presumably their mothers have congregated at the foot bridge I use to get to class. This bridge is built over an irrigation system. Meaning it's over a bunch of rock and dirt and there is rarely any water flowing. Why would people bring their kids there? It isn't fun. The first day I went around them. Yesterday I walked through them, but one of the dumbass parents walked right in front of me and said in a sing-songy voice, "Who's that walking on my bridge?" Are you freaking kidding me? I mean, do they even realize they are on a college campus? Today I walked through them again while they were standing directly in my way playing telephone with cans and strings. It wouldn't even be so bad if the parents would tell their kids to move when I walk through. But they don't. I think they expect me to say excuse me and be all apologetic. The thing is that they are in my way. I don't understand why they don't realize that. If they do this every day from now on I really predict some serious problems.

Mom told me I should make a record of the following stories. Plus, I guess Matt & Mary Ann haven't heard them:

1) Isabella had her friend birthday party last Saturday. She was a little snotty. At least to me. When Megan and Josh were ready to take her home, I asked Isabella for a hug goodbye. Here's how it played out...

Me: "Isabella, can I have a hug and kiss goodbye?"

Isabella (emphatically): "NO!"

Megan (scoldingly): "Isabella, Aunt Katie has done a lot of stuff to help for your party. You should say thank you and give her a hug."

Isabella: "NO!"

Megan: "OK, well I guess she just won't give you your presents tomorrow."

Isabella's attention was somewhere else until that last statement. She whipped around and ran over to me and said all in one breath, "Thank you for helping with my party bring my presents to my house please."


2) The day after our family birthday party I decided to eat a piece of leftover chocolate torte. It's like the best dessert ever. Isabella wanted a piece of her own, but the dessert is very rich and I didn't feel comfortable giving it to her without Megan's permission. Trouble was Megan was on the phone. I offered Isabella some of mine, but apparently that wasn't good enough. She waited until I had about a 1x2 inch section of cake left. Then she said, "Well, maybe just a little bite." She took my fork out of my hand, stabbed the leftover chunk and tried to stuff it in her mouth. That didn't really fly with me, but it was kind of cute.

My day started out pretty crappy. I woke up at 6:30 AM to try and finish my impossible reading for my Mythology class. This chapter was primarily about Dionysus and it was very, very boring. I also had to do it without my glasses because I couldn't find them. It's pretty hard to find glasses when you're not wearing them. Sometime after I began reading, the construction across the street began. Lots of banging, trucks backing up, that kind of thing. Then my stupid neighbor let their puppy outside. I should say shut their puppy outside. The thing was barking and whining forever and it sounds like it is right outside my door. Eventually they let it back in. When I went outside to leave for school the construction people decided to completely block the outlet on my road. There are only three houses on my road and we pretty much all exit out the same side. So, I had to try and turn my SUV around on a pretty narrow road to go out the other way. Walking to school some people decided to block my path because whatever they were doing with their kids was so much more important. I got to class and found out that the majority of people failed our test on Friday. I was pretty sure I did badly because even though I asked if there were essays and the teacher said no, he still put three on the test. To me you have to study completely differently for essays. Anyway, a lot of people got 45s or 55s. Only one 91, which was the highest grade. And it was mine. Yippee!

Peacocks

I was surprised to learn that there is a myth that explains why peacock feathers look like eyes. The story goes like this:

Zeus got together with this chick named Io. Hera thought there was some funny stuff going on so she tried to catch Zeus in the act, but a nymph kind of created a diversion while Zeus turned Io into a cow. When Hera showed up, she knew what had happened and so she commisioned a creature named Argos to watch the cow. Argos had anywhere from 4 to 100 eyes, but the point is that at no time were all the eyes closed. Zeus sent Hermes/Mercury to lull the animal to sleep and then cut its head off. Hera took its eyes and placed them on a bird's tale creating peacock tail feathers. The peacock was often associated with Hera after this. Io was stilll stuck as a cow and Hera sent a "gadfly" to follow her everywhere until she got to Egypt. By the Nile, Zeus and Io were reunited and she bore him a son, Epaphus. It is possible that Epaphus is the Egyptian character Apis and Io is their goddess Isis.

Prometheus

Well, I know all three of you have been waiting by your computers for my next installment. So here it is:

Prometheus, as some of you may know, was a Titan. Meaning he was born to Uranus and Gaia. When Zeus overtook Uranus, Prometheus and some others helped him. He is probably best known for both creating man and giving them fire. His name means forethought and he has a general reputation for being a little impish and for his intelligence.

There is what is known as an etiological myth associated with him. An etiological myth is one that explains a ritual. Apparently, Prometheus took an ox and wrapped up all the good parts so they looked bad and wrapped all the bones in fat. Zeus chose the more appetizing package--although they both sound pretty gross--and was furious that Prometheus fooled him. This myth is supposed to explain why it was Greek tradition to offer the bones and fat as a sacrifice to the gods.

Prometheus also angered Zeus when he gave man two things: fire, and blind hope. Fire is supposed to be symbolical of creative potential and leads to other knowledge. As punishment for Prometheus helping mankind, Zeus had Hephaestus/Vulcan bind him with bronze to a crag in the Caucasus Mountains, the farthest point East known to the Greeks. Every day Prometheus had his liver eaten out by an eagle. Every night the liver regenerated so it could be eaten again the next day. This continued until Heracles/Hercules released him as one of his twelve labors.

In other news, my teacher is teaching a class in the fall about the mythology in Harry Potter. There is only one seat left and when registration opens back up I'm going to try and steal it. Also, something else broke on my car. I was on my way home tonight and a little bunny ran out in front of my car. I stopped, but it didn't go anywhere so I honked my horn. The button got stuck. I eventually got it to stop, but not even turning off the ignition made it quit. So basically, my car has one headlight out, one tail light out, bad struts, locks that won't unlock, windows that sporadically roll down, a broken radio, no heat or AC, and now the left horn button doesn't work. Good to know.

Mythology

Well, I was hoping that the picture of Matt making out with Marlo would cause a little more raucous. Oh well. He was darn cute.

My first day of summer school was yesterday. I was late for class, got coffee on my white tank top, and sweated profusely from the 85 degree weather and lack of AC. I was ridiculously hot yesterday and today and I'm a pretty cold natured person. I was a little surprised when I got to class and saw a guy(?) wearing flannel pajama pants. I also don't have AC in my car and my windows work on a sporadic basis. I got them rolled down today, but then they got stuck down for quite a while.

The class itself is interesting. My teacher seems to be VERY smart. So far, I've noticed he speaks and writes Hebrew and Greek as well as Latin. The class is only Greek mythology which is a little disappointing. I was hoping for some Norse and Egyptian mythology too. However, in the past two days I've realized that I don't really know that much about mythology. Our reading last night was about the Creation myths which I am now going to share with you whether you like it or not:

Apparently there are three different ideas-
1)Pelasgian Creation Myth
Initially there was Chaos, meaning the "yawning void." Then the female, Eurynome (meaning broad, straight, order), arose form the Chaos and separated the sea from the sky. Ophion, a serpent, then emerged from the sea and impregnated Eurynome. Eurynome became a dove and laid the Universal Egg which as the name implies, is the egg that everything comes from. Eventually Pelasgus, the first human being was created.

2)Homeric/Orphic Myth
Actually I'm not really sure how this one is different from the next one, so I guess I'll have to ask about that. I think maybe it's the source because the next one is from Hesiod. Wait, I guess Homer believed that the Titans Oceanus and Tethys were responsible for the origin of the gods. This is indicative of the belief that the universe is a flat disc and Oceanus surrounds the earth.

3)Olympian Myth according to Hesiod
It begins with Chaos. Five things emerge from Chaos: Tartarus-a really bad dark place, Eros-love, Erebus-black night, Night, and Gaia. Gaia/Ge or Mother Earth appears on the scene and she creates Uranus, the god of the sky, and Pontus, the god of the sea. Gaia mates with Uranus by Uranus raining on Gaia to fertilize her. She bears first the Hecatonchires (hundred-handed), the Cyclopes, the Titans, and later the Giants. The problem is that Uranus was afraid of being usurped by one of his children so he started trying to hold the children in her womb. Gaia obviously didn't really appreciate this very much so she turned to her youngest son, Cronus meaning "time." She asked him to castrate Uranus in order to punish him. Uranus came that night to Gaia 'cause he wanted that sweet lovin' and Cronus "reached out with his left hand and in his right he seized hold o f the huge sickle with jagged teeth and swiftly cut off the genitals of his own dear father." He threw the genitals into the ocean and Aphrodite was born from the foam. Side note: Aphrodite literally means "from the foam" in Greek. That is why the Birth of Venus depicts Venus coming out of the oyster shell on the beach. Something that I have never learned in any of my art classes.
Back to the story: Cronus mates with his fellow Titan sister, Rhea and they take over for Gaia and Uranus. Cronus was also afraid of being dethroned so he actually swallowed his children after Rhea gave birth. Finally, when she had Zeus, she sent him to Crete to be raised until he came back and slit Cronus open, freeing his brothers and siters: Hetia, Demeter, Hera, Hades, and Poseidon. Zeus and Hera mate and you've heard some of the rest.

I know it was pretty tough to follow any of that, but there were a few things that surprised me. 1) Apparently, Eros is not the son of Aphrodite as I always thought. According to the description above, he is actually of the same generation as Mother Earth because love is a force that is equally as old.
2) I also always thought that Aphrodite was a product of one of Zeus' affairs. According to Hesiod, she is actually Zeus' aunt.
3) I didn't previously mention this, but I had similar confusions with the advents of Apollo and Artemis. I always thought that they were producst of one of Zeus' affairs, but it is also thought that they are just other names for the Hyperion and is daughter Selene. Hyperion being the first sun god and Selene being the first goddess of the moon.

One thing I do know now, is that there are a lot of inconsistencies in the beginning myths especially. Doesn't seem very organized to me and it seems like they would have had their geneaology straight. I mean, how do they expect to do their baptisms for the dead?

Tomorrow, I will discuss the myth of Prometheus. I hope you can wait until then.

Cheer Up

I heard through the grapevine that the cosmopolitan Perkins family is a bit home sick. I was looking for some of my baby pictures and came across this beauty. Hopes it brings smiles to your faces:

And if that didn't work, Dad will be out soon and I think he's bringing you all some fabulous surprises. So hang in there!

Oh, to be Threeish Again

I start Summer School on Monday. I'm pretty excited about the class I'm taking, but it occurred to me the other day that I'll hardly ever get to see Isabella because I will always be at school when she and Megan go to the cabin. So, I got permission to take her out to eat and get ice cream after her 1 mile Rabbit Run this afternoon. The last time I took her out to eat we met my then boyfriend, Drew, at the restaurant. Isabella loved him and called him "Sue" because she couldn't pronounce his name right. She asked me at least ten times where he was and why he wasn't coming. Finally when we were leaving the restaurant I told her that we probablly weren't going to see Sue anymore because he doesn't want to be my friend anymore. I was just so upset about it by then I didn't know what else to say. She just looked at me, and said, "Well that's okay we can just squeeze you two together (at this point she squeezed her hands together) and you will be friends again." You can't beat that kind of logic.

What?!

I cannot even believe this nonsense.

Confession

I want you all to know something...

"I exude brave fantasticisms."

Morganton

So something else has happened in Morganton. A 17 year old girl disappeared and when her family tried to file a missing persons report the police said no because she probably just ran away. A few days ago she was found, naked and beaten to death behind a young man's house. It is unknown at this time whether she was sexually assualted.

I didn't know this girl, but apparently we knew some of the same people. I just can't believe that this much violence has occurred in a town that was once considered one of the top ten places to raise a family in America. That wasn't that long ago. It makes me sad because while some of you don't like Morganton, it's what I consider home. When I feel lonely and stranded up here I go to Morganton and almost instantly feel better. Now it's like one Law & Order episode after another.

Pictures

So DJ has been someone I've talked about for a few years now. Not everyone has had the unique opportunity to meet him, so here are a few pictures. I think it's funny to gather people's reactions, because he's not exactly someone that most people picture me with.

DJ looking at his illegitimate baby.

DJ looking at his illegitmate baby from the other side.


DJ holding Noah's hand.I had to make him do this, but I think it's pretty cute.
DJ peeing in the road next to my car.

And, as a reward for looking at the other pictures, here is a picture of Isabella a friend she made on the train at Disney World. At least Isabella thought she was her friend, LaTonya didn't seem quite as smitten.

Wisdom From That 70's Show

Hyde: "Love is for losers who can't stand to be alone."

Eric: "Ah, no you're thinking of kittens."

General Update

So I guess nothing crazy has happened in Morganton lately. At least I haven't heard about it. My friend is doing well. She's getting a new job and an apartment for her and her daughter. That's a relief, we're very close so I always worry about her. I started "working out" again the other day and am now very sore. I put that phrase in quotes because I don't really think what I do qualifies as a workout. I can't really do anything too strenuous seeing as how I'm an 85 year old woman. I did my Budokon home workout which is about 20 minutes of yoga and 20 minutes of karate kicks and punches with a meditation session at the end. I believe it helps me with my flexibility, which I am quickly losing, and I like the meditation at the end. I've never really been very sore from it before so I guess that shows exactly how out of shape I am. I plan on hopefully doing my New York City Ballet workout tonight. It's not quite as fun as Budokon, but it also helps with my flexibility and is something a little different from yoga. Plus, I'm taking Ballet 1 in the fall as my PE so I think it will give me a little jump start.

In other news, I just got a message from DJ's best friend wanting me to call him back. Even though I am still friendly with DJ, I don't really want to talk to this person. He makes me feel pretty bad in general, so I don't think I'll call him back. That makes me feel guilty too. I'm a little surprised that he called me at all. I thought he knew I don't really like him. I confuse myself. I feel like I'm very upfront with people and what I think about them, but it seems like a good percentage of people just don't get it. DJ and Robert, the guy in question, have always been the type of people that think that no matter what they do, if they wait long enough the injured party will get over it. They've known me for over 4 years now so I don't know why they think this philosophy applies to me. It's befuddling. I think I'm making the right decision not calling him back.

Illustration and Stuff

As we all know, Mom got a digital camera for Mother's Day. I installed it on her computer in exchange for me to be able to borrow it and take pictures of my illustration work from this past semester. The work was two big to be scanned. The pictures aren't very good, because I can't handle digital cameras very well, but you get the idea.

This first project was supposed to be a black and white spot newspaper illustration about dreams. Originally I wanted to draw a succubus about to attack, but decided to go a more traditonal route that would appeal to more people. Also, my teacher told me he could see that I really had a personal connection to a succubus. He had only known me for like a week, plus I don't think I act like that at all, so I was pretty offended. Anyway, obviously the basic idea for this is a child's room morphing into different animals and such while she's sleeping.




This next project was for a magazine cover about love. I think this is pretty self-explanatory. I did it with prismacolor pencils which are pretty waxy. It's been in my car for a long time so the wax has created a weird film over it in areas. You can kind of see that on the right.


This project is one of my favorites. It's kind of hard to see in the picture what it is though. The assignment was to put an animal in a human situation or make an animal into a vehicle. I kind of combined both and drew a pig in a cop's uniform as a helicopter flying over a pot field. The dark parts are the marijuana bud, which is what is actually smoked. I thought if I left those off, it wouldn't be as funny. They're too dark. I just think that combatting marijuana smoking is a colossal waste of time.


This is one is my very favorite. It was supposed to be self-promotional piece, but since I don't believe my illustration skills are as strong as my graphic design skills, I don't plan on using any of this stuff for my portfolio. I decided to have more fun with it. I also considered it my opportunity to make myself look really hot. I particularly like the little comic strip at the bottom. The redneck portrayed may be inspired by a real person.


So I'm kind of wishing summer school would start. I have about another week and a half. Thanks to some anonymous donors, I was able to register for a mythology class that will count as my last English credit. I'm pretty excited about the course, hopefully it will be interesting. I've always been interested in different myths from different cultures and how they influence our lives even today.

I've also decided that I need some distractions. According to Napoleon Dynamite, girls like guys with skills, you know like numchuck skills, computer skills...conversely I'm guessing guys like girls with skills. I don't really care that much about that, but I have decided I'm going to workout again. I've lost most of the weight I gained after high school, however, there are a few pounds that are staying just to spite me. I just want to get in good shape. I don't feel like I'm strong enough or that I could defend myself if something happened. I mean, I can handle myself in a fight if I know it's coming, but probably not if I was attacked or something. I'm also a little terrified by the fact that my fibromyalgia seems to be getting worse and worse every year. So I think I'm going to work on that. Hopefully if I get into good shape it won't be aggravated as badly.

I curse the day I offered to do these invitations. Megan has been really good about them. She doesn't really care what I do with them as long as I have them done in time and they have the requisite information. I may have just chosen a really complicated way of producing them. I also had a relatively short amount of time to work.

Anyway, here is a little bit of my process for those who are interested. I looked up some pictures of elephants and them sketched them on paper. I sketched them in pencil and them went over that with pen, which kind of made some of the elephants look psycho.



Then I scanned them into the computer and traced them in Adobe Illustrator with the pencil tool. I still tried to maintain the sketchy, illustrative quality of a hand drawing. Then I copy/pasted the Illustrator files into Photoshop. I colored in the drawings with the paintbrush tool on a low opacity so it still looked handmade with markers or actual paint. This took a VERY long time with help of the layers feature and eraser tool. The rest of the invitation was also created in Photoshop. Here is the basic finished product. I scanned it in so I wouldn't have those weird color problems from before. The colors here are still pretty washed out, but at least the strawberries don't look like grapes. Also, the margins are a little off from the actual invitation.


Here is the cover as before. I made some adjustments to the back feet and added a tail:
After you open the cover you see this, I added more strawberries, moved the image to the corner and reconfigured the text. I hope the juice doesn't look like blood. I think it does:
Here is the inside with the actual party info. Isabella is kind of strangely obsessed with laughing right now. She has a really creepy fake laugh that she uses most of the time now. That's why I included all the laughing onomatopoeias.

This is a logo I put on the back like the card company or something. I actually already had the bee from a logo project I did in Graphic Design I. I call Isabella Isabee sometimes so I just thought it was cute.

It's Official

I'm completely depressed. I just feel like a raw ball of emotions. My best friend did leave her husband and I guess as a going away present he beat her up and trash their house in front of their daughter.

Today I just kept thinking about all the weird things that have been happening to people I know. I came to the conclusion that most people my age are just selfish and heartless. I was getting really upset until I realized that I'm the same way. I'm personalizing other people's tragedies. None of the things that have happened really have anything to do with me, but I'm getting all worked up over them. I mean, until I found out I knew the rapist in that case I was completely uninterested in it. I actually woke up with the TV on, the story was being reported and I turned it off.

Also, all my friends that actually made it college have graduated and I still have another year and a half.

Or in this case purple...

I know you couldn't wait for the punch line so here you go... the color is messed up on this one too. I didn't scan it, I just posted the JPEG from photoshop. I guess I will scan the whole thing when it's done because this color is awful. Isabella is having a friend party on a Friday or Saturday and a family party that Sunday. This invitation will be a trifold sort of pamphlet format and on the inside will be some more elephants playing and eating strawberries with the party information. For her family party I am thinking a sort of art nouveau floral pattern, pink and aubergine color scheme. I'm going to include some pictures so that Dad can take a copy to the Beirut Perkins family even though they can't attend. I figure Nana will also like that. The pictures will probably be black and white.

GeEZ LouIsE

I got news that another classmate of mine killed himself yesterday morning. Also, my best friend is apparently leaving her husband. Again. Life is feeling just a little too real right now. I need some cheering up.

I am trying to design Isabella's birthday invitations. Her friend party invitation thing is first on the agenda. Megan wants to hand them out on Monday so I'm trying to finish it tonight so we can work out any possible printing issues. Isabella has requested a strawberry party. Megan is not exceptionally thrilled with that idea, maybe because of the girliness factor. I've tried to unisex it up by building the invitation around a joke Mom used to tell a lot. Here is the front. Still working on the rest. I know you'll be on the edge of your seats till you see the punchline. Um, also the colors are wrong. I'm not sure why. Obviously the strawberries are red/pink and the bows in the ears are the same color.

Unsettling Thoughts

When I was a senior in high school a classmate of mine was arrested for murdering his grandparents. His grandparents were essentially my best friend's step-grandparents. It was a big deal obviously for all of us and everyone wondered what happened and what was going on. I literally woke up from a nap to see him being arrested on the local evening news. It was a pretty surreal experience. He is currently serving a life sentence for those murders.

On May 2nd, another Freedom classmate of mine was arrested. Arrested for the rape of a 9-year-old girl. Apparently, he snuck into her house and raped her while her hearing impaired mother was using the computer in another room. His defense is that he thought he it was his ex-girlfriend. The girl is his ex-girlfriend's little sister. I can't say I was friends with this guy. I have spoken to him on countless occasions. He was a "goth" kid and was in a few of my classes. He was really smart and we both took art classes. We had a lot of mutual friends. I always thought he was really nice and the "popular" kids that I hung out with just didn't give him a chance. Right. I cannot believe that I am such a horrible judge of character. I think everyone wants to believe that you can spot people who would do something like that. It really bothers me a lot that I actually interacted with someone who would ruin a child's life in that way. I really can't get it out of my head.

I just don't understand these people who do these kinds of things. What kind of disgusting, twisted mind would commit rape, but especially rape of a child? It's really disturbing and since I have so many personal connections to it, some that I have not even mentioned here, it really messes with my head. I mean, people are never safe. I refuse to go anywhere, or do anything without feeling secure. It causes me to spend a lot of nights at home when other people are out partying, but what else am I supposed to do?

My concept for this series was to take seemingly disgusting things and force people to look at them (hence the white background) and to hopefully find something beautiful about them. Luckily, my neighbors cat killed that bird the day after I proposed this project. Whenever I did that print I mad the mistake of asking a completely stoned fellow student if she thought the print was too light. I guess it really tripped her out because she just kept telling me that it looked like a negative because everything that was white should be black. I kept explaining to her that I just put the bird on a white piece of paper and took the picture. The background is supposed to be white. She never really got it which was confusing to me since I was holding an 8x10 piece of photo paper and not a negative. Eventually I think I just walked away. I knew she was high before hand but most people up here can still function when they're high. I guess that's why they feel comfortable getting stoned before class. Anway, I digress. I really like the apple and banana, because I think it looks like they're cuddling. Mom and I decided that may be why I don't have a boyfriend. I got a 90 on this series because she said they weren't in focus.

My teacher loved these pictures. I like the flamingo one, but I can't say I'm in love with the Ankole cattle. I think I only like the flamingo one because of that little mallard that swam into the middle of them. These pictures were taken in Disney World. The flamingos are Asian flamingos that you can observe while going for kind of nature walk. The cattle are in special environment that a fake safari bus take you through. The guides are incredibly annoyingly cheerful for the most part and the road is paved to be bumpy. Not conducive to good picture taking or good times for people with fibromyalgia. My teacher really rave about these, but she only gave me a 94. Oh well.

I don't really like how these pictures are showing, but it's the best I can do. This was my first series for my Photographic Design 1 class. I got a 95. That class was really intense. It taught us how to use our SLR cameras, load and develop our own film, and develop our own prints. If I had time for all that I think I would have really enjoyed it. I know some of you have seen these already, but bear with me. I was trying to take pictures of Isabella finger painting, but intstead she decided to paint her entire body. The assignment was to "see light" so I side lit her with a lamp I had on hand. I also used a wide aperture with a slow shutter speed to capture some of her motion.

One More Try

So, I decided to give the blog thing one more chance. I do like having a place to post my work and get feedback. Occasionally I also have something interesting happen in my life. I'm hoping to keep the access to this blog limited so as to avoid another psychotic Canadian/Lebanese commenter. I chose the title of my blog because it's a phrase I use a lot. I consider myself a pretty honest person. My honesty is very rarely appreciated. I was thinking today about how I seem to have a fairly abrasive personality since I'm described as "mean" or a "bitch" or "brutal". I was trying to think of a way to defend myself and it could just be the medicine I'm on (see below) but this is the best I could come up with: for every 1 person that thinks I'm mean, there's at least a half a person that likes me. Hmmmm. I think I should have been a lawyer.

I have finished my Spring Semester and am relatively unharmed. I made A's and B's with the exception of my Graphic Design 2 class. Which kind of sucks seeing as how that's my major and all. I'm still pretty proud of myself considering I took 18 credit hours and the most I've ever stuck with is 12. First day of summer vacation I threw out my back and had to stay in bed for a few days. Mom took me to the urgent care center in Blowing Rock where they gave me some nice pain killers and muscle relaxers. However, I suppose at some point I caught a virus because I spent the majority of the next day trying to walk to the bathroom with my injured back to throw up. I am feeling much better now.